Are Women Really That Difficult To Understand?

The million-dollar question that was asked mostly by men from around the world.

What did Oscar Wilde the great Irish poet and playwriter say?

“Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.” — Oscar Wilde

Do you agree with him?

My thoughts: I won’t agree. Women are both to be loved and understood. Oscar Wilde’s perception was different than what modern-thinking men and women currently believe.

Why did he believe that it was difficult to understand a woman?

“Men think about women. Women think about what men think about them.” — Peter Ustinov

It is said that women mean exactly the opposite of what they say and confuse you.

It is said that you must be highly intelligent or on par with aliens to decipher the code… as to what she says, and to help you, (the poor soul)… there is a manual.

  1. Fine – This is the word women use to end an argument when she knows that she is right and you need to shut up.
  2. Nothing – Means something and you need to be worried.
  3. Go ahead – This is a dare and not permission for you to carry out some type of action that you planned on doing.
  4. Whatever – A woman’s way of saying, “Screw you!”
  5. That’s OK – She is thinking long and hard on how and when you will pay for your mistakes.
  6. Bonus word – Wow!… This is not a compliment. She is amazed that one person could be so stupid.

Source – Pinterest

My thoughts: Men are letting down the women with these stereotypical views.

Are you aware of the two theories regarding arguments with women?

“There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.” — Unknown

My thoughts: Hmm, first tell me the theories.

How is it exactly that the misunderstanding starts?

Misunderstanding can happen if you don’t care to answer her daily routine questions (It’s said these questions are predictable).

  • Tell me ‘I love you’ as many times possible.
  • Are you listening to me?
  • How is that you are an expert in ‘selective hearing’?
  • Don’t you think she is prettier than I am?
  • I’ll be in 5 minutes. Darling, stop screaming and why can’t you wait some more time… you know I am dressing up for the function?
  • Why do you hesitate to say “I love you’ as many times as possible?
  • Why is it that I am the only one who needs to take care of the kids all the time?
  • Am I not looking thin these days?
  • You are not loving me as much as you used to love me when we first met.

My thoughts: These types of things are possible, and the reasons can be many; starting from ego, jealousy, suspicion, cheating, and inferiority complex… to… possessiveness and obsession, too much stress… to… ‘I know it all’.

Why are women so unpredictable?

A million-dollar question and scientists tried their utmost best at trying to understand it.

“Women have a passion for mathematics. They divide their age in half, double the price of their clothes, and always add at least five years to the age of their best friend.” — Marcel Achard

My thoughts: It’s rubbish. Their thoughts are always for the benefit of the family. women say what they mean, but it’s you giving different meanings in a different situation to suit your inferiority complex, and I can say… you are making fun of them.

Women remember things forever

A woman’s memory is excellent in the sense that they allow their bad memories to linger.

“Women always worry about the things that men forget; men always worry about the things women remember.” — Unknown

My thoughts: Think many times, before you argue in support of your behaviour because most of the time women are right.

Who is to be blamed?

“Nature gives women so much power that the law has very wisely given them little.” — Samuel Johnson

My thoughts: Only men need to be blamed since they never make a serious attempt to understand the women and think that they are the dominant force.

Can a woman change?

Did you ever try to change your woman?

Is it not a fact that you always failed?

“Brigands demand your money or your life; women require both.” — Samuel Butler

My thoughts: Is there any need? Even if you think so… why don’t you change first, my friend?

Why it is said women are complicated?

Sorry, my friend, you are making a mistake. I never said so. Listen to Kathy.

“An uncomplicated woman gets complicated when she finally says what she means.” — Kathy Dunnehoff

My thoughts: Women are not complicated. Men are.

Men’s love towards women changes over time unlike women’s’ love towards men. Again exceptions are possible.

Do women misunderstand other women?

I don’t know the answer. If you are a female reader you can guide the rest of us.

Why it’s worth loving a complicated woman?

I am lost as to why you are calling her a complicated woman.

My guess: You are calling her complicated because you fail to understand her.

Still, it’s worth loving her. Why?

Here are some plausible reasons:

  • She has a lot of intriguing stories to tell.
  • She gives you endless challenges that can make your life more exciting.
  • She is smart and understands you better than anybody else.
  • She lets you know that love is about making compromises.
  • She teaches you that love needs effort.
  • She teaches you that love in itself is complicated.
  • She helps you to understand your emotions and yourself better.
  • She is like a book that you’re never tired of reading.

Source – lifehack

My thoughts: I agree.

Is there any logic in saying that women are difficult to understand?

“Mathematics and women are similar, as they both are complicated, but maths… is better, since it has logic at least…” — quotes2woman.com

My thoughts: It’s arrogance and male chauvinism.

What is the root cause?

The whole concept boils down to the way one interprets.

The problem with the human being is that each one of us has a unique basis of interpretation.

Strange are the ways we humans lead our life and interact with each other based on our perceptions.

What is right to you is wrong to others.

And differences in perception plays a larger role.

To put it simply, we all don’t see eye to eye.

This is the root cause of the misunderstanding. Intolerance adding to the fuel.

After so much discussion, what is that one can derive from all of this?

Some useful points to consider:

  • Both fail to define the exact meaning of love, affection, and total dedication (Does this have to do with too much expectation?)
  • Listening but not registering.
  • The funny part is both the man and the woman assume that the other is the reason for the misunderstanding!
  • This is because of a lack of commitment and authenticity.
  • I feel both the genders lack in giving proper attention to what the other is saying or feeling. Both have to take the responsibility equally.
  • Mutually respecting each other’s perspective and thus reducing the communication gap.
  • Mostly one tries to have an upper hand on the other.
  • Men and women are like the lines of a railway track… they have to be together throughout, otherwise their life, in this case… the train… will derail.
  • In the majority of the cases, the misunderstanding happens because of the mentality of the men (They believe that they are the dominating force).
  • Sometimes women too have to take responsibility because the women misinterpret men’s behaviour.
  • In addition to the chaos caused by the man and the woman, the kids are placed under tremendous stress; thus influencing their mental stability; which causes greater harm to the society at large.
  • The woman thinks of friendship, while the man thinks of sex.
  • Being friends and being sexual partners are altogether different. Sexual partners can be more than friends!
  • Being friends is possible but sexual partners being friendly takes a hell lot of time and total understanding.

Take home message

Not all men are alike.

Not all women are alike.

There are beautiful and loving couples in this world — the one who made a better world to their children to live in and instilled the values of mutual respect and tolerance and most importantly being kind to all the sexes.

Please add your viewpoint and tell me your reasoning as to which gender can easily misunderstand the other.

Thank you. Namaste 🙏🙏🙏

About the guest author:

Dr. Sridhar is the man behind Philosophy Through Photography.

This deep thinker from India wears many hats; he is a physician, a blogger, a philosopher and an amateur photographer.

Published by philosophy through photography

My philosophy is: Life is hard, but God is good. Try not to confuse the two. Anne F. Beiler

60 thoughts on “Are Women Really That Difficult To Understand?

  1. I think we aren’t meant to fully understand each other, I think it was designed this way. I don’t see the benefit of men understanding women fully and women understanding men fully. It takes away the mystery, it takes away conversations that we could have if we both know each other 100%.
    There is to be a level of difference because our brains are not wired to think the same and difference is okay. 😊
    This was a very thought provoking post. Thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 6 people

    1. Thank you Olivia for your thoughts.I know… nothing like being kept in suspense since we don’t know what the other person is up to….but things are OK as long as the story is a ‘happy ever after’.

      So you feel,It’s better…if the life, between man and woman continues to be a suspense,thriller and finally a mystery.

      🙏🙏🙏

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m surprised either of you were brave enough to tackle this topic, but then again, remember I recently escaped the People’s Republic of California where men aren’t allowed to express any views about women.

    Let me start by politely disagreeing with the “men are complicated and women are simple” assertion. I think Dr. Laura Schlessinger put it best in her book and radio show. Men are actually really simple (as a GENERALITY); They want food, sex and to feel needed or validated. IMO, Women pretty much want the same things too, with the addition of security / stability (again, as a GENERALITY). Women just go about chasing those things in more complicated ways and feel a need to constantly test everything (perhaps in that need for security).

    “Yes, he’s cute and I like him, but I’m saying no to his asking me out because I want to see if he’s REALLY interested and will pursue me.” as a classic example. Do I really need to explain all the dating confusion this causes? NO, I’m ABSOLUTELY NOT saying this is an excuse for sexual assault either. NOTHING justifies that.

    Want a root cause to all male-female problems? Women expect mind readers, men expect women to be as direct as they are, and neither is willing to meet in the middle.

    Liked by 6 people

  3. I would love to “Like” this post, but I find myself in 100% agreement with the quotes not the questioning writer. IMHO, women just have an innate need to over complicate the simplicity of life.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Yes, we’re complicated (We don’t always understand ourselves), but wouldn’t life be BORING if we weren’t? 😉
    Thanks for a good post. There is a book entitled “Men Are like Waffles, Women like Spaghetti,” meaning men tend to think in a compartmentalized way, whereas in women’s minds everything is interconnected. That might be nature, or because women so often end up multitasking (soothing the baby, cooking the dinner, answering the phone …)

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Ann Aschauer,its my pleasure to hear from you.
      Yeah….life is boring if the perceptions are not different.In fact this makes the life colorful.

      Thanks for ref the book “Men are like waffles,women like spaghetti’-title of the book itself making one curious and to read the book.

      Multi tasking capacity of women is a God given gift and they are so fortunate
      🙏🙏🙏

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh ! Great thoughts there !

      It’s always interesting if the perceptions differ and people start arguing why their perception alone is correct.Some food for thought for otherwise dull and boring life.

      Two good quotes coming to my mind

      “One way to prevent conversation from being boring is to say the wrong thing.”
      Francis Joseph Sheed

      “There is no conversation more boring than the one where everybody agrees.”
      Michel de Montaigne

      Thank you Eugenia.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I love this! Love is formed as the two people in a romantic relationship seek to understand the other, not just to get something but because they believe the other person is worthy of it. Your post really got me thinking and I love that the final resolve is that there are no real difference. People are people.

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Dear Dr Sridhar, great minds do think alike: I just finished working on a post dedicated to Oscar Wilde. You’ll see it soon.
    As to communication between men and women, besides the famous John Gray’s “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus,” I would recommend to anyone who truly wants to understand the other half of humanity to read works by Dr Deborah Tannen (“Communication between Men and Women”) and Edward Hall (“Culture According to Context”). You have raised an important issue, dear friend!

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Great post! I agree with you in most parts. But I think women feel the need to be complicated and mysterious to keep the relationship alive, however, I feel simplicity is the key here, people should listen not to answer back but to understand each other. Believe me, only this attitude change can solve a lot of misunderstandings.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Neither of the two party is right. The man is wrong, the woman is also wrong. God is right. When God is at the center of it all, the marriage/relationship becomes blissful. Thanks for sharing. God bless you🙂

    Liked by 2 people

      1. I’ve been married for 25 years and have to disagree, the woman is ALWAY right, even if she’s wrong. The man only needs to remember two words for a successful marriage …. “yes dear”. 😀

        Liked by 1 person

  9. First, I would HIGHLY recommend the book “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus”. Second, consider this: Men can use only one side of their brain at a time and women use both at once. We all often expect people to think like we do but that is a very unrealistic expectation. Communication is absolutely key! I’ve been married for 34+ years and it’s still hard to adequately communicate my feelings.

    Liked by 3 people

  10. Thank you so much BB&Y for reading and commenting.

    Yeah I have started reading the book’ John Gray’s “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus,” also recommended earlier by Dolly.

    True what you said regarding communication and also the ability of women making use of both halves of the brain,strangely men fail to grasp!

    Like

  11. I really like your beautiful blog. A pleasure to come stroll on your pages. A great discovery and a very interesting blog. I will come back to visit you. Do not hesitate to visit my universe. See you soon. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

      1. 😯 You are right, Dr. Sridhar. Your comment did end up in the spam folder.

        I highly doubt that saying, “Thank you,” triggers Akismet’s spam detection because I have regularly thanked people for reading and commenting.

        I am wondering if the Happiness Engineer gave you the most appropriate advice.

        As far as I know, Akismet is a separate entity and the Happiness Engineer should have forwarded your issue to another engineer — one from Akismet that handles spam-related issues.

        I know that it all sounds a bit confusing. Akismet and WordPress are two different companies; those two companies are run by Automattic — the same company that runs WordPress.

        An engineer from Akismet would have sent you a link to their special site and would have asked you to leave a comment to see if your issue was rectified or not.

        Liked by 1 person

  12. I LOVE ‘the manual’ to decipher womanly communication Dr. Sridhar!! I will only speak for myself (not all of womanhood) but that manual describes me to a TEE!! All 5 of my husbands would agree (well 2 are deceased but the rest would agree).
    I think I for the longest time did not really say what I meant….that took learning. And I had to become confident to speak my mind w/out offending said husband…….
    I finally learned to “say what I meant, I mean what I said.”
    Once I got to that stage my husband at the time could decipher my woman-speak….
    As for Men…well you are an amazing gender…very complex & very interesting. Probably accounts for me marrying so many times!
    Seriously I find men my age (60+) very complicated now. When I was younger I had NO trouble understanding mens’ ways of thinking. I am making a generalization here. There are very intelligent men my age somewhere out there!
    I rarely get to engage in conversation with intelligent men….I am not saying the men I know here are stupid or ignorant; I mean they are not very worldly or educated. I find I want to have discussions about many things with men my age but they seem to be preoccupied…..
    Anyway I DO enjoy your posts & ‘chatting’ with you.
    Might I also say culture plays a HUGE part in communication between men & women. Being raised in Canada with European Jewish values was pretty restrained & when the 70’s/80’s happened things changed majorly for women in general & for me! I valued myself as worthy as a man & did a man’s job. Being ‘one of the Boys’ was awesome! At first the men thought me cute as I expected. Then as time went by & they saw me work as hard if not harder than they did; the respect grew. Many a long night, myself & 5-6 other Tow Truck Operators would get together at The Rainbow Restaurant & have lively discussions & a few debates. WE learned so much from each other. Maybe that was the key for me understanding men…
    I never interacted with women on that level until I turned 50…..I had alot to catch up on!
    Thank you for a great post & for letting me share my experiences.
    With kind regards, Sherri-Ellen T-D,

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Hi Sherri-Ellen T-D,appreciate joining the discussion.

    It’s a wonderful feeling that you took trouble and helped, all of us here to understand the discussion better.

    Your observation that ,men are amazing gender….but complicated is interesting.

    I was under the impression that men become more mature as they age.

    Happy to know that you cherish the memories of Rainbow Restaurant.

    Glad that you are coming to know women and understanding better after you turned 50.

    Thank you so much for sharing your experience which I am sure can be a guidance.🙏🙏🙏

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Renard,I am at a loss as to why all my responses for the comments are going to your spam folder uninvited.

    Just joking.

    I know you will pull them back to place where they are supposed to belong.

    I am scared to type ‘Thanks in advance’ since the happy engineer banned me using the ‘thank you’ word.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Thank you Dr. Sridhar for your reply. I wish I could say that the men I know who are 60+ plus have matured. Unfortunately most of the men I know where I live are not ‘mature’. Mind you they are not as highly educated so maybe that has a bearing on their lack of maturity?? I hope I do not sound like I am ‘man bashing’ because I am not. I just can’t seem to connect with men in my age group the way I did as a young woman with the Truckers…I DO treasure the Rainbow Restaurant memories. I miss a male perspective on things.
    I guess there is a balance tho’ in that now I have girlfriends who are at my same educational level so we have open & interesting conversations.
    Sendingn you good wishes! I can hardly wait for your next guest post!!! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Thanks again Sheri-Ellen T-D for further eloborating the relationship between man and woman.

    True education plays an important role in shaping the fine balance between genders.

    As far as the age is concerned may be combination of seniors mingling with juniors help? I don’t know.

    Have a great day

    You are kind and always encouraging

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Good day Dr. Sridhar! I hope Friday finds you well.
    I agree alot about education defining the genders…also how we are raised. I’m sure there are still countries that would be shocked to see women working on gigantic Brake Press Machines or driving Tow Trucks or ‘Big Rigs’ as we call the transport trucks. There are certain gender norms to be maintained. I’d NEVER have been able to have a career in Trucking in the 70’s in many many countries because it was not the ‘norm’ for women to work in ‘mens’ jobs.
    A funny little antedote to my story: My Father was old world German Jewish man. My Mother was born in Canada & Jewish but not devout (like my Father). There was an age difference also. I EXPECTED my Mother would totally support me becoming a Tow Truck Operator…she was in mid 30-s in 70’s so a part of the modern culture. My Father was mid 40’s & very classic in his views. Oh & they were divorced after 17 years of marriage.
    Well when I announced to them I was training to be a Tow Truck Operator my Mother’s jaw dropped to the floor & she said something like “NO Daughter of mine is going to do such a dirty, grubby man’s job!” Followed by “What will my friends think of you working in such a dirty job?”
    Of course being a ‘bit’ rebellious I went on with training, lol…..
    My Father, the one I expected would have reservations about such a career congratulated me & said in his adorable German accent. “Daughter! Daughter I am so proud of you!! You have my blessing!”
    It was my turn for MY jaw to drop to the floor…..
    During the 5 years of Trucking my Father would proudly introduce me as his Daughter who was the 1st female Tow Truck Operator! He was so proud of me.
    My Mother on the other hand would never introduce me like that. It was like she was ashamed of me. Go figure?
    I LOVE your idea of Seniors mingling with Juniors & I’ve always done that. I get along with all people of different ages.
    It seems that men 60+ & over look for women who 1) have money 2) have a car 3) are able to ‘take care’ of them & 4) also look 30 years younger & “ACT” like that too.
    Their view of things is skewed. I tell my male friends “All you REALLY want is 2-25 year old women & a dishwasher!!”
    Most men agree….that says something about them doesn’t it??? That is why men are so complicated!
    With respect, Sherri-Ellen

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Good evening Sherri-Ellen. The local time is Saturday 19.45 pm.

      Wishing you a great weekend.

      Happy to hear from you because you give us the perfect analysis of stages of individual life on various situations from your personal experience.

      We are all thankful to you.Glad that your dad was very helpful and paractical.

      Agree with your mum.All mothers are same and tend to be traditional especially those belonging to 50s and 60s era.

      Nothing like mingling with people of different age groups.The experience one gets is unique.And you are lucky because of your bold decisions.

      Ha ha…you brought smiles and I have to agree with you that men are complicated as compared to women.

      Thanks again for the chat.It leaves me a pleasant feeling.

      Take care.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Good afternoon Dr.Sridhar! Many thanks for your comments & encouragement. The conversation we are having is exactly the sort of conversation I’d love to have in offline life with a man. But I need to have a Doctor or Psychiatrist for a companion for this level of connection!
        You know you have something there about Mothers being more traditional. Mind you, my Mother was nowhere near acting ‘traditional’! She did her own thing & ended up divorced because of it. So I saw her as someone who wouldn’t actually ‘care’ about what career I chose.
        So it WAS a BIG surprise to hear her freaking out about having ‘her’ Daughter in a grubby & dirty ‘man’s job!
        And even funnier when my dear Father defended me to her saying “MY Daughter is a trailblazer!
        Oh & something else I forgot to mention is that I WAS raised by Maternal GRANDPARENTS from 4 months until 10 years of age. When my Grandparents took me Nanna was 51 years old & Zaida was in his 70’s. I was surrounded by older Aunts & Uncles & even Great Aunts. So I have always been comfortable with mature people.
        That is why I did Home Health Care for Elderly for 7 years also.
        Now I qualify for getting that kind of care! I guess I’ve come full circle 😉

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Thank you Sherri-Ellen.

          Glad that both of us are enjoying the discussion.

          Mothers are ‘traditional’ I meant, they imbibe the values both to their daughters and sons.
          In your case you are fortunate that you had an understanding dad.

          Glad that older relatives of yours made you comfortable throughout.

          It’s a pleasant surprise to me that you are a specialist & expert in Home Health Care for the Elderly.

          Becoming a senior citizen is a great honor !

          Liked by 1 person

          1. I SO-O agree Dr Sridhar that I am now a Senior. I have some serious health issues & never thought I’d make it past 50…I am now past 60!

            I have to agree that as hippy dippy as my mother was in HER actions; she sure was very traditional when it came to me. My step siblings found the same thing with her!
            My Step Sister became a Social Service Worker & my Step Brother became a Sous Chef…..

            I did alot of Nursing in the 7 years I was in the field. I was a Nursing Assistant as I couldn’t give needles (too scared!)
            I did Elder Care & I was also a qualified Attendant Care Aide for Para & Quadriplegics. That was a tough job but I loved it. Oh & I was also trained in doing Medical Research gathering articles about particular topics & compiling them into a proper report.
            And them I went back to School & got a Psychology Degree! I did do Marriage/Couple counselling & Youth Counselling for 10 years. Then my health forced me to retire.
            But guess whose phone rings for medical advice to this day??? Mine….lol….
            I will admit that my passion was Tow Trucking tho’…I get all misty eyed when I see a beautiful Tow Truck!
            I forgot to mention that during my Towing days I did Police calls & arrived @ accident scenes b4 the Ambulance & even the Police…..I saved a few lives with CPR & First Aid. And I lost a few people who were too injured but I gave it my all!!!
            Thanks for a lively discussion!! I truly enjoy ours!
            Sherri-Ellen

            Liked by 1 person

            1. Thank you Sherri-Ellen for the humorous way you replied.I had many smiles.

              Truly you are a multifaceted giant with multitasking capacity.

              As far as health is concerned I know – one can’t escape as one ages.

              We get used it.

              An this fact you know well since you spent most of the time in medical related jobs.

              I feel so proud to know that many people are alive to day because of your expertise and timely CPR.God bless you

              Like

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