As a person, I’ve always been an introvert. Sometimes, I’ve even considered myself smart just because others were not able to understand my “high level” talks (at least that’s what I thought). But boy, was I wrong! Having good people skills do help in making relations better!
I just had one Meetup with 4 random strangers, which changed my perspective of what other people could offer me, which books would have never. Yes, I’m a hardcore reader.
Sure, books are a great way to learn and understand other’s perspective but you don’t get to clarify your doubts, do you? I’m definitely sure that it’s no… You WILL have to read that book after some period again.
Anyway, when I met the wonderful strangers, I got to understand the value of sharing each others’ real-time and real-world experiences with the practical enthusiasm, dedication, and spirit they were talking with (no book can give that). I was just starting in my writing career, but they were far in the future in their career. Few of them already set up in life.
Offering Of Others
When I first started talking, everyone’s attention was on me. I got nervous and sweaty but damn those were some understanding people and really good listeners. But I was the one who kept the low profile and only opened my mouth when extremely necessary.
This got me to thinking about what I could do and learn if I could just converse. Let the people laugh at me, at least I’ll get to know who amongst is the worth talking to.
I realized I should probably go to some public speaking class but my pockets shouted, “Nooooooo!” 😅 Yet still, I could learn a lot about human relations, if only I just talk with random strangers.
Long story short, I met 9 new people and found 2 of them fascinating in what they do and how they got there. What did I do?
“All I did was let go of overthinking about what people might think if I did any mistake.”
Being Creative About Human Relations
In our lives, all we want is Happiness and Success but most of us don’t know how or don’t want to change ourselves to develop our personality. All we want is for others to change for us. Is that justified?
Success and Happiness only come from other people. Sure we’re being told to create our own happiness, but we can’t do it alone. About 85% of your success and happiness depends on how you treat other people in any business, occupation, friendship, and other relationships.
But I’m Great With People?
That’s what we say, but are we?
Most of the time we’re confused between being good in human relationships and getting along with people.
Getting along with someone basically means you’re compatible with each other in one or more fields. But when you’re a people person, you deliberately FIND something mutual, if there isn’t anything, you create one. This lets the other person believe that you’re genuinely interested in them.
Dealing successfully with people leads to personal satisfaction and the best way to create human relations is to understand and respect the other person’s ego.
“Ego is ultimate force which drives human behavior and creates or destroys a relationship.”
If you behave in such a way with a person, which tramples his ego or self-respect, you’ll lose his respect.
“Behave and talk with people in such a way that they don’t have any reason to show you their ego.”
Take a look around yourself, observe the most successful and happiest people. What do they have which you don’t?
“They have a way of dealing with people in such a manner that, they don’t boast about themselves but instead they tend to focus on other people and their problems.”
Do You Have A Personality Problem?
Nope… You just don’t know how to deal with people.
The only thing you need to be successful and happy is to learn to deal with people.
And how do you do that is by making other people feel most important.
- Give respect without expecting anything in return. Never expect anything in return.
- If anybody has an opinion, listen properly not to reply but to understand. Agree with them and tell them how it can be made better. If they’re wrong, don’t be blunt by saying ‘No.’
- Ask for small favors.
- Don’t try to be careful or accurate all the time. Be yourself. If you made a mistake, no problem.
- Admit your mistakes and faults. Let other people know you’re also a normal human being.
Never feel bad if someone doesn’t like you. You can’t make everyone like you. All you can do is be yourself, and let the right people be with you.
“Expectations Hurt. When you don’t expect anything from anyone, you can never be dissappointed. Being true to yourself is a sure shot way of achieving happiness and success.”
- Being an Introvert is great, but you have to find a way to communicate with people. It will be exhausting but soon you’ll realize its worth.
- Let go of your ego and treat people the way you want to be treated. Imagine each person you meet has a label written: “Make me feel special”.
- Listen more, talk less. Silence is a powerful language which only few can understand. Somebody has rightly said:
“It’s better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.”
- Don’t expect anything from anyone.
About the guest author:
Adil Parray is currently based in India. He is a talented blogger, a fantastic content writer, someone who is knowledgeable in the area of SEO and a gifted graphic designer.
This gentleman’s eye-opening blog is called: Life’s Journey.